All Mindless Voices
by oddends
Summary: Ren Ae, girl reincarnated into a boy faces troubles along his journey to greatness. Also he's slighty insane. SemiAntagonistic!OC maleocxmale


Naruto doesn't belong to me. **_Masashi Kishimoto_** owns except my ocs. This is my first fanfic so wish me luck! This is boyxboy because I'm tired of reading from girls' pov. Boys need love too.

I was thinking about boys - Charli XCX

I Messed Up

My name was Renae Dyer and I killed my dad and then I killed myself.

It was weird being reborn after everything I've done. I mean I killed my father for christ's sake and then killed myself. Not because of the guilt or anything but because I didn't see the reason to live anymore. For sure I thought I would go to hell as those Christians preached about everyday.

For starters, I didn't want to kill my dad but I didn't like the guy. I never did and I seriously don't know how my mom loved him.

It all started when I started high school. In the last year of primary school before I entered high school. I worked my ass off for good grades and a scholarship. At first when I entered high school everything was fine until later down. My grades dropped a little bit in the eighth grade but it was nothing to worry about. Until every year my dad kept asking about scholarships. I was happy for my mom since she was the one who practically paid for everything regarding my education and my wellbeing. My dad has absolutely no role to play regardless of what he claimed.

I didn't care what he said because I grew to hate him. Where I grew up discipline was in the form of beatings. I didn't like that no matter how great the results were. I was afraid of him and the only ones who knew this were my brothers. Ramsay, my older brother who was a psychologist in training pyschoanalyzed my brother and I. He said it was unhealthy keeping this from my mother. I didn't want to tell her this and ruin the already rocky relationship between her and my father.

My parents weren't married, thank god! I didn't want to see my mother get married to that man. I couldn't and I wouldn't allow it.

No one in my family knew I was suffering from depression except my internet friend I met two years ago. I think her name was Resny. In my past life I tried more suicide attempts than I can count. It never worked because I always chickened out and I was afraid to leave her. She had depression as well and I had helped her. In a way we healed each other's wounds but the scars remained. I never once doubted her on who she said she was. I loved her and she loved me.

So when one day out of the blue I had received a phone call. It was from her brother SJ. Apparently Resny had been mugged and murdered walking home from her university.

To say shocked was an understatement. The girl I met, the girl I healed, the girl who healed me and helped keep my sanity in check had died. I shut down. I was never the same. My friends at school couldn't understand what I was going through becasue they didn't know I had depression. They didn't know I had bad thoughts and that I was suffering from an eating disorder that Resny helped me through.

Resny's death, hatred of my dad, my parents rocky relationship, my depression, my eating disorder, my fear of dad and my hatred of myself. I think that created the perfect shit show. No one knew anything because they didn't understand. At school a fake smile can go a long way. At some point I had completely broke down in my English pool class. Which was weird because I was not a person to suddenly cry.

My friends noticed and I snapped and told one of friends since the seventh grade. I didn't tell her about eating disorders, despression or how I hated myself.

One of my friends, Alyce was a Kpop and Anime fan and she introduced to me to it. I immediately liked it. I was slowly trying to repair myself since I was going to be a senior in high school. My dream was to become pyschologist. The irony of it. How was I, partially stable person help people off their rockers. It turns out I was wrong. I wasn't stable at all.

I was like an elastic band stretching very thin.

One particular anime I had liked was Naruto. It was amazing at first but I hated the ending of it. Don't get me started about Boruto! I had so many issues with Naruto but I continued watching the anime. For one reason why I hadn't read the manga was because it wasn't available in my country and it was a bother to illegally download it. I mean everyone forgets my country even exists but it's okay. No kpop idols' world tour to my country.

I killed my dad after coming home late from my club meeting at school. He was pissed because apparently I didn't tell him. I told him, he just doesn't want to listen. It became a screaming match between us in the living room and then suddenly he hit me. I snapped. I was tired, tired of him and everyone's bullshit.

I got up quickly and ran towards the kitchen and grabbed the kitchen knife. He ran towards me and tried to grab me but I aimed a stab as his sides. He backtracked, he was wide eyed. He couldn't believe that his daughter, his own daughter stabbed him. It was too late.

I aimed a stab again and again and again. Even when he was dead, I kept stabbing him. I wad so angry at him and angry at myself for ruining my life. I got off him, still in my bloodied uniform and turned the tv on. I played my favourite kpop songs and fangirled. Here I am, bloodied in my father's blood dancing like crazy and I swore I smiled at his body in the kitchen.

I aimed the knife at my throat and slit my throat and fell on the couch my mother loved so much and smiled. I still could hear Blood Sweat and Tears by BTS playing.

A/N: So I tried my best and I hoped you guys liked it. As you can see my grammar isn't the best so if you want to beta please ask. Tell me what you think and review!

Question: Who's your favourite villain?

xoxo

Ren


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